The stone the builder refuse

It has been a transformative 12 months. This time last year I was restless with life. I was tired of my job in Houston and was grasping for purpose and direction. I had huge aspirations, yet felt tied down and hopeless in my situation. After months of conversations, I finally got the faith and subsequent courage to back out of my job at BP as a staff photographer, and make the move to Charleston, South Carolina.  I went to pursue the Lord and a photography career that I hadn’t even begun to plan. I’m sure some must have sat back and wondered, ” this guy is crazy. Why leave a good job in the middle of recession with no plan?Sit still and learn patience and discipline… just Chill OUT!”

But I have always seen it very differently. I’ve seen it through the lens of big risk, big reward, or rather, strong Faith-fulfilled life. This is where things begin to change.

I did not think it was possible for me to ever succeed as a freelance photographer, not because I can’t take a good photo, but because I absolutely hate business. I hate money transactions and putting value on myself and charging people and friends for something I continually think of as ho-hum photography. In addition to that, I couldn’t see how not getting a good paycheck every two weeks would work. Getting paid once every 6 weeks, or 3 weeks or 8 weeks… what? How would I ever manage?

The other huge inhibitor was my perspective on the categories of photography and how and where I thought I could make the biggest contribution and most lucrative money. Corporate, obviously. Editorial, sure. Advertising, soon enough. There was one category that I didn’t venture into. Specifically, I harbored an unfoundedly strong distaste for weddings. This is the Stone I have refused. And this is the one I am humorously, graciously accepting.

I always saw weddings as working at a party, and I always wanted to party.  I always saw it as me being someone’s pawn, not as a way to serve people. I was always annoyed with the family’s, and never realized that I have one too. I always saw it as a regimented way of shooting, not as a place to embrace my style of photography. How wrong was that perspective? Quite.

I feel blessed to have had my mind transformed. Because now I see an opportunity to have a life I’ve always dreamed of, and now I can see the path. I feel fortunate to have a reason to invest in gear I want and need, to serve people on one of man-kinds most celebrated, cross-cultural traditions, and to have a way to provide for the most amazing woman ever, and to enjoy this life.

I am thankful that I have stopped refusing the stone.


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